BOY MISSES GIRL

It’s almost a year since I’ve been away from home. How nice to say that I’m working my ass off to aid my family and to build my own career. I’m not the eldest yet I feel like one. It’s probably a trait, not a responsibility. I’m happy, though, as long as I don’t feel any pressure. But don’t talk about having to miss family gatherings, viewing tagged family pictures where I wasn’t even there, chatting with your parents and seeing and hearing them cry because they miss you. It gives me the sh*t, ok? Homesick, indeed, but I’m strong enough to endure it. I’m definitely enjoying. Add the fact that I get to do whatever, whenever, buy the things I want, party for some time like there’s no tomorrow, and travel as a tourist.

Until I remember her.

More that the length of my stay here was how long we’ve been apart. Not just physically but you-know-what. Do I miss her? Let’s see.

After the “US”, I’ve come across a couple of girls whom I was able to have a relationship with. The last was decent, yes, as long as it involves me and a girl whom I can exchange I love you’s with. It was a “no hands” relationship but it was the closest thing I had to not be called single. At least, I know, I made one girl happy until the break up part. It was fun while it lasted but didn’t give me the sting.

Besides from work, it’s just bed, movies, mp3s and game consoles that I like dealing with. What would you expect? I’m just a carefree guy. And the reason to be here is work, so let me be serious with just that. I do go out occasionally: going to the mall, hearing mass, partying with buddies and going to the other state to visit relatives and friends. But just that. No other fun time like at home and I do miss it. Now, do I remember someone? We'll see.

Who would miss someone who constantly calls you, one whom you exchange e-mails with, one whom you religiously chat with every week and one who explicitly reminds you how you were loved and cherished? Would I?

It isn’t hard to remember those times that I had with that person. It was the happiest, sweetest and longest relationship I had. Probably not the most-experienced, you know what I mean. We may not have been to many places during our time but I’ve been to the farthest happy place when I was with her. Our times together combined may be a little shorter than those times that we have to be apart. But she was able to make me feel as if I’m waking up every morning with her beside me, as if I’m having dinner with her, as if I’m hitting the bed with her there waiting for my goodnight kiss.

Before her, I’ve been with other girls who, I can say, are far different. Just a week, I can get them to bed for one whole day. Overnight, I’d be raped. But just like every person, they come and go. They went, she came. She was too different. She’s smart, witty, a bit childish at times, sensible, sweet, and the prettiest and sexiest (may I say?). But she was too wholesome. The only same thing she had in common with my pasts was me (Is she lucky?) Pursuing her, I can’t talk about days or weeks here, but months. I wasn’t really serious at the beginning but the snobbish yet funny person she is made me want to wait. I thought I was too smooth of a suitor when I felt she was starting to like me. But Jesus! What’s with girls that they don’t want commitments? Ok. So aggressive that I was and still am,I tried the best pick up lines to work, some didn’t, some DID. And finally she was mine. And our sweet years started. I felt like I’m maturing having a serious relationship. At my age, then, I’d say it was about time, you know.

How mature? Some guys might think that I’m all too good of a lover boy who can third base with the girl already. But no. Would you believe that in that 3 straight years or more, I only slept with her thrice? And when I say, sleep, it only involves hitting the bed, hugs and kisses before sleeping, goodnight greetings, closing eyes, waking up at wee hours and sharing the blanket, and viola! Good morning! Of course, we did have intimate moments like any other couple. I’m not a rock, dude. I was able to talk my way to her and share the sweetest kisses. And the closest thing we had to s*x was that fifteen-seconds-you-know, with clothes on. What can I do? She’s a treasure and I don’t want to ruin it. At the time, I wanted to take her to the altar pure and clean. And the honeymoon might really be the best and sweetest time to share that moment with your one true love. Mushy as it sounds, but that’s how I felt for her. She was my queen and for her I’d do (and sacrifice, for that matter) everything.

Our three years with each other was my closest thing to forever, until I ended it. I know, I hurt her. I was, too. But there really are things that we, guys, can’t make girls understand.

So, do I miss her? Yes, I do.  Now is probably not the time yet, but it would be really nice, sharing more moments with this girl. Just like before, I wouldn’t rush. I would take things slowly. I’d want to give her time and myself, too. Who would want to ruin the same treasure twice? She’s so strong, I’d probably be the one to crash when the same thing happened again.

But before anything happens, I have to know, DOES SHE EVEN MISS ME?